Whose Booty? Part 2 - Special American Idol Edition
I occasionally tune in to Fox’s monstrous hit of a show “American Idol,” but for the most part, I’m pretty much detached from that hot mess, until THE OTHER EFFIN NITE when I accidentally tuned into the Primetime Live special which drew 13.8 million viewers. I knew nothing about this Corey Clark cat, and couldn’t have cared less until I watched him throw Paula Abdul’s poor ole ass under an effin bus. Dude “exposed” Ms. Abdul in accusation after pretty damning accusation alleging that Ms. Thing unprofessionally helped dude out during the 2003 season of the show. He claims Ms. Abdul assisted him in selecting wardrobe, cleaned his durty broke country ass off, provided him with haircuts and such, as well as providing him with a “special” cell phone to be used exclusively between he and her. He claims she even selected material for him to perform while competing which would give him a tremendous advantage with the big jig nigga judge over the rest of his competitors. He then delivered a deathblow when he claimed Ms. Abdul backed that thang up on dude proper like. Dayum!!!
I guess shit gets thick (n/h) because supposedly, the show’s contractual rules pertaining to appropriate behavior are extremely stringent and if violated, contestants as well as judges will be subject to ejection amongst other harsh penalties. I remember they threw that big bitch Frenchie off the show on account of her not informing the show that she exposed her big old ass on some big bitch porn site, so I would expect Paul a Abdul to be pretty much SHOOK at this very effin moment.
Now, I know controversy makes the world go round, but what I can’t get is why dude would be so upset and vengeful over getting hisself a slice of MILF-ish celebrity snatch, … unless there’s more to the story. Now, I’m certainly not an expert on this, but something didn’t seem exactly right with dude in the first place, and I’m not referring to his country drawl. However, when Primetime decided to get his two “homeboy” weed carriers to comment on the veracity of Corey’s allegations, shit was as clear as air. Now any healthy and wholesome young American male at the ripe age of 20 would gracefully tap that ass and would psychologically carry that shit proudly like an effin Olympic Gold medal to his death bed. Mr. Clark however, appears not to be a wholesome young American male. As he and his "buddies" proudly exuded last nite, Corey and entourage are an effin pack of cocksmokers!!!
Think about it, dude kept every single receipt, every single phone record, every lil piece of evidence he could (just like my ole lady would do), passed notes around with Paula like they were playing tiddly winks, and even had the gall to record some fagged out sounding r&b record like a freakin bitch made dude using lines from Paula’s 1992 smash hit “Straight Up”. Now if Mr. Clark and his buddies Roget and Jovan ain’t fudgepacking pillow biters, then ship me straight the eff off to Iraq with a sheepskin jacket and black Durango motorcycle boots (no homo).
I guess the “three amigos” probably feel like this is payback for Paula “violating” the leader of their cheerleader squad, I dunno, but I do know how vicious those queens can get, you know, that whole “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” shit.
Now if I were one of Paula’s advisors, I’d advise her to be wrong and strong with this shit and “expose” how tinker bell and his flaming self kept harassing her 24/7 about where’d she get her shoes, who does her hair, could he borrow money to cop some of her blush and all that queen type shit butt buggerers get into when they start hanging out with pretty girls. Hell, I’d even advise her to go so far as to claim dude stalked her and broke into her crib to steal some Mac eyeliner and accessories, along with some hot pink Manolo Blahnik pumps. Now Paula ain’t that bright, what with wasting some poontang on a poo putt on like that. I don’t know about ya’ll, but I’m pretty much certain if she gave Rueben Studdard’s big burly sweaty ass (n/h) a piece of tang, dude’s coonish smile would have been a whole lot wider during that ’03 season. Off course, Paula would very much have to worry about Rueben coming back and bribing her for a year’s supply of Super Smokers Barbecue Baby Back Ribs, drenched in their secret delicious special sauce, but that’s a story for another day.