Ha ha, just kidding. I don't really believe Nelly is innocent. I have no idea what happened on that tour bus. No serious person would have an opinion about an incident they don't know anything about.
All we do know is that Nelly was arrested the other day for rape on a tour bus in a Walmart parking lot in a city in Washington I hadn't heard of. Nelly is officially at that point in his career where he's playing gigs in rural Washington, opening for a puppet show and sleeping on his bus in a Walmart parking lot.
Cops were called to the bus by the alleged victim, and they say they found enough evidence to arrest him for rape, which I took to mean they saw he was black, and I'm assuming the alleged victim is white. According to astute commentator Tariq Nasheed, that part of Washington is 82% white. That seems low, right?
It seems kinda ridiculous that you can be arrested for rape just because someone said you raped them, especially if you're a (one time) celebrity like Nelly. Was the attack caught on video? Was a rape kit performed? Or was this a situation where there's no question as to whether there was sex, only whether it was consensual?
The latter usually comes down to a matter of he said she said. Many would argue that, in situations like that, where there's no proof other than her word against his, the only moral, legal than to do is find the guy not guilty. Some would argue that there shouldn't be a trial in the first place.
I've since heard inconclusive, seemingly conflicting reports about the alleged attack on Nelly's tour bus, from TMZ and elsewhere. Supposedly, the girl got drunk at a bar and left with Nelly. He took her to his tour bus and, in his bedroom, tried to hit that. It sounds like maybe she didn't want to have sex without a condom, and (of course) he did.
She says Nelly then tried to offer her some money, but she didn't take. Another woman then arrived, told her it was time for her to leave and tossed $100 at her, as if she were Danny Aiello in Do the Right Thing (spoiler alert). Nelly's lawyer is suggesting that the alleged victim might be trying to extort Nelly. Presumably, she wanted more than $100.
In a statement released via the requisite screencap of some text in a notes app on his phone, Nelly seems confident that justice will prevail, i.e. that he'll be found not guilty and maybe the alleged victim will be tossed in jail for making a false accusation. The fact that he was so quickly, and publicly, arrested, I would argue, doesn't bode well.
He's out there in East Bumblefuck, WA. A lot of people don't know, the only reason people live in the Pacific Northwest in the first place is because a group of white people went out there to try to create a society with no black people. The accusations have already cost him quite a bit. People weren't buying his albums anyway, but what's the likelihood that he'll be invited to open for another puppet show.
It just goes to show the difficulty of trying to maintain a career decades after your last real hit. In retrospect, he would have been better off just buying some pussy, but obviously he didn't have that much money to spend, if he was sleeping in a Walmart parking lot. 15 years ago, he would have been banging some R&B starlet for free, in a nice hotel room.