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February 08, 2013

Revealed: The title and cover of my latest literary accomplishment

Infinite Crab Meats
(Cover by Theotis Jones)

I've been working like a Hebrew slave trying to get my new book just right, or at least readable, and I'm within a day or two of having it ready to be sent off to be printed. Bonus.

I'll spare you any more talk about how trying to write, edit and publish your own book, all while continuing to constantly troll the Internets for fight videos and pictures of certain kinds of women, and busting the occasional shift at the BGM, is a work-intensive process, which is no good for a lazy brother such as myself.

The title, as you can see, is Infinite Crab Meats. It's based on the infamous GIF image from a few years ago, the suggestion of some young guy in the comments section, and Rawse's undying love of crab meats.

Below is the text that will be printed on the back cover of the paperback version. It'll give you an idea of what the book's actually about.

Infinite Crab meats is an all you can eat buffet of probing, insightful hip-hop journalism. It's like Crab Legs Night at an actual Chinese buffet, except you don't have to wrestle with rednecks in order to make sure you get a plate. Have as much as you'd like. Pretend you're Rick Ross.
Rawse isn't just namechecked in this book's hilarious description. The lifestyle choices that have led to, among other things, him not being able to take very long plane ride without having a seizure, and him not being allowed to perform in some places anyway, are discussed at length. This book is filled with useful information.
Infinite Crab Meats is like Rap Genius, except that it's accurate and useful. Speaking of which, of course there's a chapter about the author's beef with the founders of the popular, venture capital-funded rap lyrics website, in which one of the site's founders threatened to kill the author, as mentioned in the New York Times.
Other selections on the buffet, if you will, include Chief Keef, Kreayshawn, Das Racist, Odd Future, teenage attention whores with ginormous cans, the cultural tourists who write for sites like Pitchfork and SPIN, the Too Short fingerbang incident and much, much more.

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Posted by Bol at 07:41 PM | Permalink


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