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July 31, 2012

If James Holmes weren't in prison, he could score with this nutty beeyotch #catch22

via swallowthefruitsofmypleasure.tumblr.com

"do i think james holmes is guilty? that is not my place to assume. i'm not the jury, but i am someone who is fascinated. i've researched the whole illuminati deal and have read tons of articles." - the girl pictured above

There's an entire community of girls on Tumblr who are obsessed with James Holmes, the guy who shot up the new Batman movie in Colorado the other day. They call themselves Holmies.

They draw pictures of James Holmes, take pictures of themselves wearing flannel (like he was wearing beneath his body armor when he shot up that movie theater), and write letters to him in jail.

Low brow tech blog FWD has a feature on it.


If you're at all familiar with Tumblr and the talent contained therein, you realize the security implications. If ever there was a group of girls worth doing something stupid for...

Only problem is, there's no way you could pull something like that off, get away with it and reap the sweet, sweet rewards. (Yeah, I spent 15 minutes this afternoon thinking about it.)

Maybe you could bust a cap in 70+ people's asses, killing (only) 12 of them, high tail it from the scene of the crime and not get caught. James Holmes, for whatever reason, didn't seem at all concerned with trying to make a clean getaway. It sounds like he just kinda stood there next to his car and waited for 5-0 to throw cuffs on him.

Did he set his gun down? It seems like even if the cops caught up with him there in the parking lot, he could easily shoot at them. There's no way they could have shot him. He was covered head to toe in body armor, gas masks and what have you. He couldn't have been out of bullets. It says in the New York Times he had thousands and thousands of bullets for each of his several guns - all purchased legally, mind you. I don't even think he had to break it up into several shipments, so as to throw off the scent.

Perhaps James Holmes figured that if he allowed himself to be arrested, peacefully, after shooting up an entire movie theater, it would make him look crazy, and the courts out there in Colorado would be left with no other choice but to send him to a hospital rather than a prison. Maybe he can even get out in a few years, like the crazy mixtape rapper who's supposedly coming to kill me.

This week is the Olympics, over in London. It says on Infowars, where I get my news, that security is extra tight, like this girl's shirt. They don't want to run the risk of one of these Arabs trying to commemorate the anniversary of the 1972 Olympics, in Munich, as depicted in the great film by Steven Spielberg. There's already been some controversy wrt the girls from the Saudi Arabian teams trying to compete in those beekeeper suits. Is that why the girls volleyball players aren't wearing those booty shorts?

Remember when the Olympics in Atlanta got blown up, back in the mid '90s? They caught the guy who did it, that fat security guard, but I remember reading years later that he didn't really do it, it was some other guy who escaped to live in the mountains of Georgia, out near that 2Pac statue that was defaced by white supremacists, Unabomber-style. If you're living somewhere off in the hills, on a tract of land you unilaterally declared its own sovereign country, it's not gonna be very easy to convince girls to come to your cabin to do the nasty.

That's not a safe place to go with a guy on it date. If he tries any funny business, and you scream, no one will be able to hear your. You can blow that whistle as loud as you want; he might even enjoy it. Your pepper spray won't be able to penetrate his luxurious beard. And then there's the fact that there's no way you can inform any potential serial killer groupies of your whereabouts without tipping off law enforcement. They'd know you did it, but how would they know where you can be found, for sweet, passionate lovemaking?

Talk about tragedy...


Byron Crawford a/k/a Bol is the celebrated author of several books, most recently NaS Lost: A Tribute to the Little Homey.

Copp dat:NaS Lost

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Posted by Bol at 04:27 PM | Permalink


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