Esoteric - Saving Seamus Ryan: Album Review
Esoteric, Saving Seamus Ryan (Fly Casual, 2009)
Several years now in the making, Saving Seamus Ryan is a concept album in the vein of Prince Paul's A Prince Among Thieves. It's about what happens when Esoteric's dog dies, then he gets robbed, then... well, just read the review.
STUDIO TIME/GOODBYE
A heartfelt tribute to a dog that had to be put down, because it got too old. I can't help but get verklempt listening to it, and I don't even like dogs. My entire adult life could be viewed as a series of bad experiences with dogs. No beastiality.
THE DARKEST PARK
An action sequence of sorts. Esoteric takes an ill-advised stroll through the ghetto. It reminds me of that time I had to drive through the ghetto to get $10 from my brother. You'd be surprised at how bad some parts of St. Louis look. Or maybe you wouldn't.
PUNKS SHOOT & STEAL
Of course he ends up getting jacked for the wedding ring with which he was about to propose to his girlfriend. He tries to explain that his father lives nearby and he's been wearing the same pants for three days straight, but to no avail.
PLOTTING MY REVENGE
Esoteric's thought process after getting robbed and also shot in the side, including an imagine conversation with Harrison Ford and a Swingers reference.
MASS GENERAL/MACKO'S ANGLE
Post-robbery exposition. Eso, the doctor who stitched him up, and the guy who shot him all kick a verse.
I NEED A DOPE BEAT
Wallowing in despair. Eso just lost his dog, the wedding ring, and he got shot. He might as well start singing country music.
BAR THIEF
Battle raps that seem to exist primarily for the purpose of employing an ingenious Bill Cosby vocal sample. Part of it kinda sounds like "Rebel Without a Pause," and part of it kinda sounds like "Baba O'Riley."
I RAP TOO MUCH
The relationship thread resumes. Thematically, it's not altogether different from "Perfect Person," or whatever it's called, from A New Dope. The chorus goes, "I rap too much. I rap too much. That's why I don't get laid enough.
MODERN LOVE (IN BOSTON)
Picks up where the last song left off (even though all these songs pick up where the ones before them left off). More whining about the strain of maintaining a committed relationship.
ACE'S TAKE
Esoteric goes to a show and gets unsolicited career advice from Masta Ace, who's also been known to be creative to a fault.
NO FEATURES
Harrison Ford convinces Esoteric to try to get a guest verse from someone famous. Featuring vocal samples from all kinds of people. Jay-Z, Nas, Kanye West, etc. Lots of shots fired. He calls Eminem a little bitch.
HOLD ON
The way this album is going, I figured there might be a Wilson Phillips sample. But, alas, there isn't. It would have been especially opportune, given today's revelation re: Papa John and Mackenzie.
SELLING SPIDEY
A song about how difficult it is to sell a Spiderman comic book when you're self obsessed and emotionally stunted. I felt the same way when my last laptop died. I lost some good pr0n clips.
TAKE HIM TO THE BRIDGE
The third act. I think he bought a gun and went to try to get the ring back from the guy who shot him and ended up getting beat up, but I wasn't paying that much attention. I got distracted thinking about that pr0n I lost.
THE KING IS THE DOG
A song about Esoteric's new dog. It might take being white to really relate to this. No Michael Vick.
CHOCOLATE POPCORN
A sappy love song about Esoteric's wife. PDA in rhyme form, and I don't mean the classic Interpol song.
THE WRONG ATTITUDE
A song about not wanting to work a regular 9 to 5 (what a way to make a living). A veritable underground rap staple. Hilariously, Esoteric contemplates getting a job at Guitar Center. When I was at Lollapalooza, Tom Breihan joked that Atmosphere look like a couple of Guitar Center employees.
MY AUDITION
Esoteric auditions for Gary Numan, whom he met at Guitar Center.
FIGHT
Denouement. Things get all Fight Club all of a sudden. I'm not even really sure what happened.
BACK TO THE LAB
Yet another song about Esoteric's new dog.
COMMENTS: There's self-indulgent, idiosyncratic white underground rap, and then there's self-indulgent, idiosyncratic white underground rap. Saving Seamus Ryan is clearly the latter. It sounds more or less the same as the last several selections in the Esoteric Album of the Month Club, which I enjoyed, but I found all of the imaginary conversations with Harrison Ford, the umpteen songs about his dog and what have you a bit much.
BEST TRACKS: "Bar Thief" "I Rap Too Much" "No Features"
BONUS VIDEO: Pterovision 6

