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June 23, 2009

R. Kelly accidentally confesses in song

Arruh

It's hardly a secret that R. Kelly stays having sex with underage girls. He's probably balls deep in a 12 year-old as we speak. But he's never actually admitted to it, even when they had him on tape.

That is, until now. In a remix of a song by the The-Dream about Arruh's album 12 Play (my bad if that makes no sense at all), he sings about banging a broad who was conceived to the sweet sounds of his 1993 release.

One problem though: If 12 Play came out in 1993, and this is 2009, a child conceived to that album could only be 16 at this point. I consulted the world's most accurate encyclopedia, and it says that 12 Play came out in November of '93, i.e. not even 16 years ago at this point. A baby conceived in November of '93 would have been born in about August of '94 and wouldn't even be quite 15 at this point. Yikes!

The thing is, you know good and well Kells didn't just come up with that part about the girl having been conceived to "Bump and Grind" or whatever. You'd have to think that, if the parents were ignorant enough to have been listening to that in the first place, they've probably told her by now. It probably came on the radio while her mom was dropping her off at middle school, and the mom was like, "Yeah, girl. This was on when yo daddy and I made you." Then the girl told Kells about it, post-coitus, while the two of them were cuddling on the floor of Kells' sauna (Kells is sensitive like that), and Kells was like, "Damn, I'm gonna have to put that in a song."

Checkit: The-Dream feat. R. Kelly "Kelly's 12 Play (Remix)" [Sharebee via BlogXilla]

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