Bol is the leading black public intellectual
According to Last Week's Poll
One day I was researching pr0n - solely the intellectual dimension of pr0n, mind you - on YouTube, and I came across this video of Noam Chomsky talking about how pr0n is degrading to women. No Boutros.
Chomsky was once contacted to do an interview with Hustler magazine, which is kinda like Penthouse, except the girls aren't as hot. (Penthouse, you'll recall, is kinda like Playboy, except a) the articles aren't as interesting, but b) they actually let you see inside the girls' vaginae.) Unaware that Hustler is a pr0n magazine, he went ahead and did the interview. He thought it was The Hustler, probably a magazine about socialism or some shit.
If he would have known it was a magazine with pictures of naked women in it, he probably wouldn't have done it. This despite the fact that he once wrote the foreword for a book by a famous Holocaust denier - not so much because he's into Holocaust denial per se, but in the interest of free speech. Were there not naked girls in the Holocaust?
Also, you have to wonder how he could have never heard of Hustler magazine, when he's written several books about free speech, democracy, and the media. Did he not see that movie with Woody Harrelson and Courtney Love, filmed during the two week span in 1995 when Courtney Love was actually an attractive woman? (No really, she was. I was there.) I can hardly think of another obscenity trial involving a print publication.
In the wake of this revelation, I went back and did some research, and I was amused to find out that people have done polls - very serious polls, actually - in order to determine a list of the world's leading public intellectuals. For example, Noam Chomsky came in first in this poll put together by Prospect Magazine in the UK, and Foreign Policy magazine here in the US. It doesn't say in Wikipedia what you actually get for winning such a poll, other than the satisfaction of knowing how smart you are.
Last week's poll on this, my own lowly media outlet, sought to determine who is the leading black public intellectual. Check the results.
Leading black public intellectual?
- Bol (46.2%)
- Cornel West (24.8%)
- Michael Eric Dyson (13.5%)
- Tavis Smiley (6.1%)
- Henry Louis Gates (4.4%)
- Marc Lamont Hill (2.8%)
- Jimi Izrael (2.2%)
Total Votes: 638
As you can see, I fucking dusted the rest of those clowns. My nearest competitor, Cornel West, only received about half as many votes as I did, and that's probably just because he was in that second Matrix movie. The closest I got to being in the second Matrix movie was paying $8 to see that piece of crap with my boy Fitz, back in 2002 or whenever that was. Nullus on going to the movies with another guy.
The only thing I'm sure some haters, like that fruit thoreauly77, will point out is that I might not actually qualify as an intellectual per se. It's true I've got a college diploma in a box in my basement somewhere, probably waterlogged at this point, as it should be, but it isn't from a school anyone ever heard of, and they only gave it to me out of pity, after I spent a good five years there having to retake classes like freshmen-level government at the ripe old age of 22.
But for what it's worth, I've got papers to prove that my English game is top notch. As if it wasn't already obvious. Also, I'll go ahead and point out that I was once recruited by some of the top schools in America, including several Ivy League schools. It's just that my ambition was never the best in the world. But if any of those schools see these poll results and are still interested, holler at your boy. Even if it's not a particularly good school, I might still be interested. I just need to get on the dole somewhere. Working for a black-run magazine is just now where it's at, financially.
