If Martin Luther King, Jr. were alive today

Never mind all that bullshit about the war and the economy. If Martin Luther King, Jr. were alive today, these would be his 10 favorite white girls.

1. Scarlett Johansson

2. Anne Hathaway

3. Zooey Deschanel

4. Keira Knightly

5. Natalie Portman

6. Katherine Heigl

7. Maggie Gyllenhaal

8. Paris Hilton

9. Jessica Biel

10. Lindsay Lohan

Comments

[AB]

No pr0nstars? That's lame, Bol.

[e-man]

Where's Amanda Wenk?

[Bol]

11. Amanda Wenk

12. Ashley Dupre

I'm not sure if Dr. King would be into pr0n. That might go against his religion.

[Champlain]

Anne Hathaway has got some guns on her...damn...we need more posts with pics of hot chicks...what is the name of that movie where she shows them off???

[nick]

that was an awesome post, except i disagree on Zooey Deschanel and paris, id like to think he would rather dip into kim kardashian and emily scott(look her up NOW). you know, switch paris for kim for the slut pick and zooey and emily for the hot but kind of weird pick.

Also, Scarlett and jessica biel are possibly the two finest cumbuckets walking on god's green earth.

[Fin]

I take it Alba got left off cause she's preggos.

[nick]

^i forgot to mention that maggie gylenhall makes me puke a little inside my mouth every time i see her, not to say i wouldnt pipe though.....

[Bol]

I left Jessica Alba off because I figured people would try to argue that she isn't white.

Even though I never really bought the idea that hispanic was its own separate race.

>what is the name of that movie where she shows them off???

Havoc would be the best movie evar, even if there was no nudity.

[Champlain]

>Havoc would be the best movie evar, even if there was no nudity.

Please explain...you should do a post on why it is the best movie evar...

[AaronM]

Cosign on everyone except Paris. MLK has great taste.

[diallo]

Damn.

Scarlett is just bangin' in every sense.

[j]

Havoc was trill and incredibly unrealistic, most of all when Anne Hathaway got juiced by some wey, wey.

[AB]

I could name 10 pr0nstars hotter than these broads.

I feel like I'm one step closer to hell when talking about MLK in this manner.

[Thizz what it izz]

aren't these just normal people's top 10 white chicks... except for maggie gyllenhall, wtf bol

[d.j. bradley]

Awesome post!

I've never seen Keira Knightly. d.j. like Keira.

Lohan, no.

Jessica Biel. Oh ... my ... God.

Bol, you're going to hell, lad.

We're booking your ass a room at the Lorraine Motel. In Memphis.

out

[melissa]

WTF!!!!! YOU FUCKING HUMAN DIABETES BILLBOARD!!!! How dare you disrespect this man with these fucking fifth rate snowflakes!!! Are you out of your road kill pumped mind???? This is Martin Luther King fuckface!! You are also disrespecting Coretta, you faggott!! I wish someone would punish you by forcing you to eat a fucking carrot Mc Buffet.
You know what forgive me Bol. Cussing you out is disrespectful and I apologize with all the sincerity that is humanly possible. I feel so ashamed. Since the world is going to be overcrowded soon and there will hardly be enough food for us all eventually, can you please do the world a favor?? Post your picture in all health clinics worldwide and that will be the greatest source of birth control. See Melissa's just looking out for you boo! Your picture all by itself will not only serve as pest control but keep the world from inevitable doom!! Damn I love you Bol! I have a dream.... Perfect Calmness!

[Bol]

I thought Coretta was dead.

[Tony]

Nice post Bol. I'm surprised somebody took the bait (hehe) but I was impressed with the selection . . . I hope it's not racist to point out that these are wonderful white women who are truly "fit for a King."

Rock on.

[Da barbarian]

Oh shit.

Looks like you pushed the envelope too far 'cause even now I see melissa loading that rifle & thinking of you, Bol.

That pic of Paris Hilton posturing while gripping that deathburger was a laugh.

Nice collection of honeys.

[melissa]

Coretta is dead fuckface. But you are still disrespecting her by posting white plastic by her motherfucking husband's face. Oh and my apology still stands. I wish you well. Perfect calmness!

[commasaregood]

"This is Martin Luther King fuckface!!"

So its one of those four name things like the hispanics do.

[Bol]

*fights the mental picture of MLK's fuckface*

[thoreauly77]

damn d.j, was that a mystery train reference? if so, kudos.

[BUKKA BUKKA]

You should have Lauren Conrad on there

[manopike]

Bol, you are a fool. That's some seriously funny shit.

[Plug]

*fights the mental picture of MLK's fockface*
------------------
thats pretty darn ghey

[d.j. bradley]

A couple of housekeeping items:

Bol retorts to Calmness, "I thought Coretta was dead." Hahahahahahah Ha! I try not to use misspelled words as a matter of style but that was the best ether evar!

Two, count them, TWO, times Melissa posts, and where is nomamesbuey? He spends 365 24/7 pining away about the fair Melissa, now he's hiding someplace.

"Fit for a King," Tony; "Deathburger" Da Barbarian, lol.

Thanks thoreauly but whatever was going on in my comments I don't know about mystery train. You all would have to explain that to me. Then I would be clever.

In fairness, I think Melissa is funnier than shit. Her aggressive style of writing indicates she's probably male. Maybe she's that guy that got pregnant. Ya think?

out

[VARep]

Amanda Wenk may have been a worthy #11 before the whole breast reduction travesty, but check out, Diora Baird, I'm pretty sure Rev. King would've been all over that...

[SUREOUSLY]

what a shitty-ass list. You gots to be joking, paris fucking hilton, wow, you must a be very desperate man. jessica beil ok but paris hilton ahahahaha what a fag.

[SUREOUSLY]

what a shitty-ass list. You gots to be joking, paris fucking hilton, wow, you must a be very desperate man. jessica beil ok but paris hilton ahahahaha what a fag.

[Questioner]

Please move Jessica Biel to the top of the list, have you NOT seen the donkey on that girl?

Maggie Gyllenhaal would be one of his favorite white girl...nannies for his kids.get that chick off the list pronto, what the hell is wrong with you Bol.

[NoMamesBuey]

Melissa, mi amor -- where the fuck have you been, you pinchy little cucaracha? Have you been out lettin these mayates pull a fockin train on you again?

Fock, Melissa -- you know I don't mean that shit. Come back to your dayside assistant jefe, and let him refill your chalupa.

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Disclaimer

You know what time it is -- open late.

[The Spaniard]

"Even though I never really bought the idea that hispanic was its own separate race."

That's because you're not an idiot.

[Da barbarian]

melissa baby, you indeed know what time it is & what must be done.

No one has sharper fangs, or can swing a tire iron better than you, Calmness, and I pity NMB when you walk through those Taco Bell doors with flame in your eyes to scatter that "migrant" in a 100 pieces around the shop.

Take that fool and his Chalupa into the kind of melissa deathgrip that only you can apply.

[jonatan]

trust me i love them! all! for real for real! they are beyond beatiful! for real for real! beyond beatiful! trust me beatiful! trust me! but in the condition im in! they not feeling me! they are more groupies than the others! trust me! but they are all hot! especially! lindsay lohan jessica beil natallie portman keirra knightly and scarllett johansson! for realf or real! but i know! the imitations! not the real ones! i know! but i dont know none of these people! and trust me they are acting bol! to make it seem like they are trying but really they are just burning time to steal the money! thats all they are doing! trust me! goodluck and take care! but i here you though! trust me!

[stfw?]

lohan is not worthy of the list. id still hit it. sure shes hot, but not celebrity hot. just slight-above-regular white girl hot.

[NoMamesBuey]

Barbarian you focking gringo hijo de puta -- butt out of my lovelife.

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Disclaimer

Go back to fantasizing about mAnn Coulter, pinchy cabron.

[crazyjon]

Dude what the eff is up with that Jonathan cat that sticks crazy head up in here every so often. The shit ain't funny, its just disturbing.

[The Nicker]

Not the credited response:

Hilton out.
Gyllenhall out.
Lohan out.

Diane Kruger in.
Sienna Miller in.
Marisa Miller in.

Biel to the top.

Fixed.

[Smokie]

...and this is why I unashamedly love this blog!

[Hahaha]

Paris? What? And that Lohan photo must be from like three years ago when she was actually good-looking.

[fuck you]

hope you burn in hell and get raped bitch!

[not]

^^^ Sounds like something Martin Luther King himself would have endorsed. You should be proud of yourself.

[zacreole]

No Pamela Seltzer? Bl-ass-femous!!! South Central doorknockers kneegrow. That's how it is in the hood!!

[zacreole]

Margaret B. Jones-'n... For some of the King's magic fingers. BK-CK All Day-Yayy Yaayaay!