ByronCrawford.com

Defari's best interview since 2003

Are we gonna talk about the album? Or are we gonna talk about college, man?

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Madison, WI Bureau Chief Hastings Cameron writes:

This site has already run a rather magnanimous review of Defari’s Street Music. Feel free to check that out before proceeding.

Duane Johnson Jr. received his “Teaching of Social Studies” M.A. from Columbia University’s Teacher’s College in 1994, but would probably rather you not mention it. I made the mistake of bringing up Berkeley and Columbia at the beginning of this interview—intending to ask about his interaction with the Bay and NYC hip-hop scenes while in school. I might as well have asked him to sign a crate of Sad Clown Bad Dub tapes, so I threw out most of my serious questions and inquired about steroid use, R. Kelly, High Times Records. I have rearranged the chronology and cut a bunch of material for the sake of Phonte’s marriage (kidding—Defari’s not a snitch).

How to rid the world of crack babies

New Rule: Pregnant women with drug and/or alcohol problems should be punched hard in the face and then driven to the nearest Planned Parenthood.

In recent months, pregnant cluckers in South Carolina, New Mexico, Arizona, Alabama, Colorado, Georgia, Missouri, North Dakota and New Hampshire have had their asses thrown in jail for child endangerment, and rightfully so.

Of course the feminist community would beg to differ. The other day, Women's eNews published an article called Pregnant Drug Addicts Aren't Child Abusers, which argued that pregnant women with drug or alcohol problems shouldn't be thrown in jail, but sent to therapy.

Their main argument seems to revolve around the fact that pregnant acoholics and drug addicts aren't purposely endangering their chidlren. They can't help it if they're addicted to heroin or Jack Daniels or whatever. They're sick, and sick people should be sent to therapy and not jail.

Oh, really?

If that's the case, then any man who was ever sent to prison for raping a woman should be released posthaste. After all, it's not like they purposely set out to ruin some poor women's lives. They just needed some pussy really, really bad. They're sick, and sick people should be sent to therapy and not jail.

Seriously, I find it amazing that some women would go so far as to defend a woman's right to force their baby to wallow in Jack Daniels and heroin and possibly end up ethered in utero a la Rev Run's would-be baby daughter. We have to draw a line somewhere, no?

The Killers - Sam's Town: Album Review

The Killers, Sam's Town (Island, 2006)
This follow-up to the Killers' 2004 mega-smash Hot Fuss is said to have been influenced by the likes of Bruce Springsteen and Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. I thought the lead single "When You Were Young" was incredible, but I'm hearing mixed things about the album itself.

Screech administers a "dirty sanchez"

You'll recall that Dustin Diamond a/k/a Screech from Saved by the Bell has been going on talk radio shows for the past couple years now trying to raise money to keep the bank from foreclosing on his house. I guess that Saved by the Bell money ran out a long time ago.

Now comes word that he appears in one of these Pam Anderson-style celebrity sex videos. It appears as if he shot it himself and is hoping that it becomes the next "One Night in Paris" or whatever. At the very least, I'm sure it'll get his name in the papers.

Here's the thing: In the tape, he actually gives someone a dirty sanchez.

TMZ: "The tape begins with Diamond in a bathtub, narrating what's to come. It ends with Diamond introducing one of the women to a 'Dirty Sanchez.' Suffice it say, it is unbelievably graphic."

• Dirty Sanchez @ Wikipedia

From what I understand, you can watch part of the video (not the good part, nullus) at TMZ. I didn't bother, but feel free if you're looking to have your childhood (among other things) ruined.

Lupe Fiasco grows desperate

There was a famous incident at my high school back in, maybe, 1996 when this Russian kid named Ilya tried to disprove the Pythagorean Theorem.

While introducing the topic, the teacher happened to mention that you couldn't possibly have a triangle where its internal angles added up to more than 180 degrees. But this kid was adamant - like, violently so - that you could. He spent the better part of the class period at the chalk board attempting to draw a triangle with more than 180 degrees.

I was reminded of this just now when I read that Lupe Fiasco is going on Internet message boards claiming that his first week Soundscan numbers (dude caught a brick) are all wrong.

To wit (via the Rap Up):

hahahaha....hi my peoples...actually this weeks Billboards numbers are off because of an error!!!...Best Buy hadnt turned in their sales...I must remind I was the number #1 seller at Best Buy this week...the numbers without Best Buy stand at 57,000...the new numbers will be out this friday after they turn in...hahahahaha...GOD IS GREAT!!!!

As I mentioned in my post at XXL yesterday, neither 58,000 nor 85,000 first week sales would strike me as particularly impressive anyway, but it does seem less than likely that a chart like this would be off because Best Buy forgot to turn in Lupe's numbers. Is there a precedent for this sort of thing?

King of the free newspapers

I'll keep this brief, because I'm sure many of you are growing tired (read jealous) of reading about how famous/desirable to women I'm becoming.

If you're in the STL, you can catch me in the new Best of St. Louis edition of the Riverfront Times. At least, I'm assuming the bit about me is in the print edition. It's definitley on the website. You can check it out by clicking on the little graphic at the very bottom of the far right column of this page.

Interestingly enough, this has been the only award I've "won" in just shy of three years of blogging. Damn.

I've been in my share of free newspapers though. Here's are a few of my other stories in case you missed them when I posted them here before.

• Top 5 of the Moment [Philadelphia Weekly]
• The Mad Blogger {Riverfront Times]
• Cold Cuts: Bun B vs. Byron Crawford [Houston Press]
• It's a Blogger's World [Dose]

There may have been a few other stories where I was mentioned and/or contributed quotes, but once you reach this level it can be difficult to keep up with that sort of thing. Shit, I can barely roll off the couch before noon these days.

Tragedy at Run's house

I never got into Rev Run's MTV reality series Run's House. As much as I enjoyed staring at his daughters' boobs, the shit was way too sappy for my liking. Plus I found their accents grating.

But apparently his wife's pregnancy was a big plot point, the announcement of which being the cliffhanger that ended the last season. Presumably, the next season would've revolved around the baby being born and all of the attendant hoopla.

Only thing is, the baby died shortly after it was born yesterday. What actually happened to it is pretty fucking disgusting and would've ruined my lunch except for the fact that I was pretty hungry.

What I'll do is post it after the jump so that you can read it at your own risk, with the caveat that I'm still getting some pretty nasty mental pictures hours after the fact.

Also, interestingly enough, MTV's cameras were on hand for the delivery. Talk about a fucked up day on the job. So far there isn't anything about it on MTV's website though.

UPDATE: I was just informed that today marks the 20th anniversary of the death of Metallica bassist Cliff Burton. Damn.

Terrell owens ODs on pills

Suicide, It's a Suicide
Admittedly, I know next to nothing about sports. Sorry. I once considered trying to learn more about them, so that I could be the next Bomani Jones, but I figured that would take way more time than it's worth.

Plus, sports are retarded.

That said, I've been following the Terrell Owens saga for the past couple of years to the extent that it's been covered as if it was actual news. When I caught him on some talk show earlier this year, promoting some book he couldn't possibly have written, I knew something about him wasn't quite right.

Apparently, last night he tried to commit suicide by overdosing on a shiteload of painkillers. I'm sure the implications are vast and myriad, but I'm mostly at a loss.

In semi-related news, I got that new Killers album, but I haven't heard it yet. Also, who was it that said that Lupe would outsell Method Man and the Roots? Sounds like someone owes Bol a free shake in his choice of chocolate or vanilla. No Richard Simmons.

Ludacris - Release Therapy: Album Review

Ludacris, Release Therapy (Def Jam, 2006)
As I've mentioned before on this site, Ludacris seems especially desperate upon the release of this, his fifth album in about as many years. His schtick was already wearing pretty thin back in the days of the Red Light District, and that was still a bit before the age of crack rap uber alles. In an attempt to rejuventate his career, he went and got a haircut and is also trying his hand at a little "conscious" rap. Hence the neo soul-esque album cover.

Shittier comedian: Carlos Mencia or Dane Cook?

Researching today for a story I wrote about HBO's god-awful Def Comedy Jam, I came across this list of the 12 worst comedians of all time at Maxim, a site I should probably be "reading" more often.

Of course they didn't have the balls to put comedy's golden boy Dane Cook anywhere on the list. And Carlos Mencia himself barely made the list, coming in at number 12. That said, most of the top 10 are people who don't really do stand-up like that or people who haven't been active for some time.

So Carlos Mencia is essentially the worst stand-up comic around these days. Or is it Dane Cook, who's emerged fairly recently as the worst thing that ever happened to comedy? Below I compare the two on all of the points that matter and come up with a definitive answer.