Blowing up the Internets

Greetings, d-bags and worthless bitches. Your father stayed up a bit too late last night and hence just rolled off the bed like 5 minutes ago. But I see the world of sports is going nuts today with a story that involves yours truly.
I'm gonna drink some coffee and wash my chode, but I'll be back in a couple of hours with the full story.
BONUS:

