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March 25, 2005

RA the Rugged Man's sloppy seconds

RA the Rugged Man

Combat Jack's Top 5 gulliest moments he's experienced first hand in the music industry (that you won't hear about anywhere else on the whole effin planet but here)

I've been out of the music industry for over a year (with no regrets) and I realize that I've witnessed first hand some real gully shit. I decided to share with you some of my top 5 experiences (in count down fashion) over the next couple of days (weeks) starting today. Enjoy!!!

#5: R.A. The Rugged Man politely offers his sloppy seconds.

I used to work with R.A. a few years ago. I like dude (no homo). Sure he looks dirty as fuck and has been misunderstood for years (mainly for actually pulling his pink (no homo) meat stick out in front of a female employee at his former label, Jive Records. Anyways, I could never get over the fact that someone who so aptly epitomized white trailer park trash not only had mad skills as an emcee, but had cats that were really respected in the game collaborate with him on some joints (notably, pre 1997 Mobb Deep and the late great G.O.A.T., Biggie Smalls).

Anyways, one day, dude comes to my office with some skanky (but fuckable) white trailer trash biker chick. We're discussing business and this chick isn't saying an effin word. About 25 minutes into our meeting, R.A. asks me what I think of the chick, and I tell him she's decent. He then tells the chick to take off all her clothes, which she does completely (except for her socks) in the middle of my office in the middle of the effin day in the middle of midtown Manhattan. I'm checking her out and R.A. explains that this is one of his many jiz guzzling she whores and proceeds to ask me if I wants a piece.

Now, I love me a piece of steaming hot snatch more than a crackhead loves rocks, but somehow, the image of me getting wet with something already moist from R.A.'s bodily excretions was not appealing. I respectfully declined, she promptly put her shit back on and we resumed our meeting with no further interruptions. Looking back on that shit, that had to have been one of the most bizarre experiences I've experienced. R.A., being the good dude that he is, eventually went on to jerk me for monies (about 10g's) that he owed me (still does) but after the above mentioned scenario, I can't be mad at him.

NOTE TO R.A.: Dude, if you read this, you'll know who I am. Don't out me man (no homo). I still got love for you (no homo). Forget about how you effin jerked me and keep making your music.

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