John Kerry's wife is cheeky and sexy

What a creepy old bitch.

Keep in mind these pictures are post-Botox. OK, so maybe she's not as gross as Mengele the 1st's wife/mother Barbara (nobody is), but she might actually be more annoying (and I realize this is also debatable). First of all, no woman over the age of, hmm, let's say 45 should ever ever ever ever ever talk about having sex in public. If that was my grandma, that would be automatic stick time.

Did everybody hear about the Teresa Heinz Kerry "African American" flap? Apparently she caught some heat back in the '90s for calling herself African American, but then she tried to argue her way out of it by explaining that it was OK because she didn't use any hyphen between African and American. Who does this bitch think she is, Bill Clinton?

But there's more. For somebody who's so proud to be an African, this old skank has donated a grand total of jack shit to her home country of Mozambique. Between her daddy and the two Skull & Bones members she fucked (actually, I guess there could be more), she's worth an estimated $1 gozillion, which, according this one article I read, is about 1/4 of Mozambique's gross domestic product. All that money and Africa can't even get a free bottle of ketchup!

Is it illegal to threaten the life of a potential first lady? Because right now, technically, JFK is only the "presumptive" Democratic nominee. Somebody fucking end this lady, please.